without needing to prove anything

being and doing enough

So what’s your real job?

When someone asked me this question recently, I noticed it really triggered me.

I knew what they meant (kind of), and I reminded myself that they didn’t know much about me, my life, my work, etc. I also understood at least one kind of belief that might sit behind this kind of question (i.e. certain careers are respected more than others). Yet it still bothered me how close-minded and ignorant this felt.

I noticed a belief that I have released many times — a belief that I’ve told to take the backseat so it doesn’t drive my life.

It’s a fear really, of not being able to define what I do for work in a neat word or sentence, and how that’s somehow connected with not being accepted or enough.

At this moment, if someone were to ask me what I do for work, I think I would say that I’m a multi-passionate entrepreneur. I’m on an ever-evolving path that I didn’t anticipate and yet love so much.

Does anyone else feel they were taught to enjoy what they do for work… but also work hard and don’t enjoy it too much because then how could it possibly be “hard” work?

The truth is I appreciate the way my work has evolved, and that I’m clearly multi-passionate with more than one creative muse to dance with in this lifetime.

If I didn’t appreciate and align with this meandering path, I don’t think I’d be able to continue or try new things. But I realized that despite being able to co-create (instead of being paralyzed by fear, uncertainty, feelings of not being enough, etc.) there’s also the part of being with that creative life force.

This whole exchange got me thinking about the connection between doing and being.

Working, having a career, and receiving compensation in exchange for value… that may be thought of as the doing. But then there’s being.

Being is…

Feeling gratitude for the opportunities and the enjoyment of life that’s available, which includes the work I get to do.

Being is remembering that someone else’s definition of work may not be my own. And as often as I can remember (preferably daily, and preferably multiple times a day) that what I’m led to in any given moment and whatever I’m doing — it’s enough.

Being is noticing what comes through me, flowing in the energy of the desires I have, and knowing that more guidance is available to me.

Not because I proved my worthiness.

Not because I earned it through some struggle or burnout. Simply being aligned with what’s available — because I’m choosing to.

Were there steps I had to take in order to meet the current reality? Yes.

Have there been difficult transitions and “hard” work? Yes.

But not all of this for nothing. Not to prove anything.

What if it’s more like the bee who simply shows up at the flower in bloom to receive?

What if it’s like the plants that receive the sunlight and rain in order to grow? Not because of any level of deserving, but simply because they have the audacity to bust through the soil and receive what’s available to them.

That’s just it... they have the audacity.

photo by William Warby

Do they even question what will happen on the other side of that hard shell in the darkness of the soil?

Oh to be like the seed or the peach tree that extends without question of its worthiness towards the light.

To be like the bee that chooses its favorite color flower, does what it’s created to do and alchemizes it for one of the sweetest elements of life.

Oh to be like the flower that blooms, to which no one says “so what’s your real job?“ To have an identity so clearly defined that whether it’s enough or worthy isn’t questioned.

To be like nature — understood for its rhythms and seasons. For its slow and beautiful emergence in the Spring -- for its extraordinary and bold expression in Summer — for its bountiful harvest and coolness in Autumn -- for its gentle slow Winter.

And yet I hear the spirit of nature say “Oh but I’m judged too… Those who cherish only the beautiful blooms of Summer and orchestrate their lives in the opposite direction of the reprieve of Winter. Some will not understand. Some will show ignorance. But it is their experience that is limited, not your expression.”

It is their experience that is limited — not your expression.

Just like nature does, move through your seasons and cycles.

Do what comes naturally to you. Express yourself.

Grow towards that which is available to you. And in all of your doing, remember how good it can be and just let it be that good.

Remember who you are in all of this and that by doing what you love to be doing, that you are truly being.